also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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