You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I enjoy the company of your penis
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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