my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize