We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
i think i just lost a toe
Randomize
