party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Randomize
