Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
