I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
You left your phone here
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