mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Randomize
