This show inspires me to have sex in space
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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