It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
