am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
