I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize