but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
