woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
