that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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