i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I just found a bag of teeth...
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
