She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
