haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
