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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
well you can't waste a boner
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
