He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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