Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
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