I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
You can't special order awesome
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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