your parents love me but you hate me
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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