I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
we made out on top of his cat.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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