I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
It's never too late to be topless.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
