my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
