My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I fill condoms, not promises.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
