Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Are we still banned from the library?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
