oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize