Sponge bath it is.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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