it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
