i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
