i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
