Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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