my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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