Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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