if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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