where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
