Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize
