haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
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