We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize