I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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