What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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