R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
This is my life. Enjoy the view
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
