and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
