my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
