im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
