i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
