so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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