Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
being pregnant is like rehab
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
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