Cold hands, warm shart.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
