Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
